Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
no, its his 'welcome back from rehab' party.
atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
I just twinged a muscle in my shoulder trying to hug myself. In the world of loneliness-based injuries, this is a new low for me.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
Randomize
