yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
New plan: we get a little bit drunk and go to 24 hour fitness and be eachothers wing people so we can hit on in shape hot people at a gym instead of drunk idiots at a bar.
He passed out while I was riding him, and just when I was about to call it quits he opens his eyes and squeezes my boobs and goes Honk! Honk!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
Our night has progressed to doing coke off a laundry machine through a parking ticket
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
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