My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Our cab driver looks like Kim Jong il, and you're missing a fascinating conversation about Katie wanting to be carbon dated.
Parents weekend was a success.
Yeah, I guess so if you consider being arrested and having your parents bail you out a success...
Bail could have come out of your pocket so yes, I think we were financially responsible this weekend.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
You know i love you, but i just cannot fuck you until your eyebrow grows back. It's too hard not to laugh.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Randomize
