I spilled a beer on myself, so I went back to my place to change. The city marshall was at my door with a warrant. That beer cost me 760 bucks.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
Of course I'm hard in the pics. If there's a chance that these pictures will cause a scandal later in my life I at least want my dick to look it's biggest
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
The good thing about having holes in your nose from all the drugs you do is that you can't smell nasty things. Like puke.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Randomize
