And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Last night after the bar I went home and ate a pulled pork sandwich in a bubble bath
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
Any idea why the fuck i would replace all the music on my ipod with the fucking Goosebumps theme song?!?
Apparently drunk you is really nostalgic?
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
You bet your firm but soft ass I miss you
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
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