Note to self: never go down on a girl first thing in the morning…its like opening a grilled cheese sandwich
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
You showed your tits for hundreds of beads but magically became shy when there was food on the line
I just want nice things and good sex
THE VODKA TRAIN IS NOW PULLING INTO THE STATION
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
She called and said she was waiting for me naked. I got there and she was in ratty sweats, sitting in Nick's lap, with divorce papers. Needless to say my night was shitty.
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