No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
you were so high you were expressing yourself in action figures
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
just ran into a kid I used to hook up with while wearing his shirt. Only me. I tried to pretend like it wasn't his but it said his name on the back so I wasn't winning that.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Meet me at the corner of "what the fuck" and"how'd you get in my bed" in 10 minutes.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
PS my house is a mess.
pps I have a rash on my face.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
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