haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
No, fuck buddies don't get birthday party privledges...
Sorry.
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
You're the reason why I want to be a better drunk
He came to my Harry Potter marathon wearing a Hogwarts uniform. Of course I fucked him.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Randomize
