We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
My night ended with Em alternately crying and throwing up in the arms of a guy wearing a cutoff and a tiara. I sat holding a garbage can and wine glass full of water wondering how our night got to this point.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I'm hiding in the bathroom at the library but there are children here I just want to drunk cry in peace
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Randomize
