every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
she was so "full of love" from watching twilight that she came over and gave me a handjob. when does the next movie come out?
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
its kind of scaring me that i am turned on by tom cruise in rock of ages
I just dropped a paperclip into my cleavage while talking to the company president... That's an awkward moment.
Did you at least offer to let him get it out??
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
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