I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
I'm currently using two paint brushes as chopsticks to eat lasagna.... college.
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
this is the second day the intern has gotten me coffee. he either wants to bang me or thinks I'm more important than I am.
either way he's in for disappointment
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
Its one thing to reject me, but to reject me AND my hottest friend AT THE SAME TIME!?!?
Randomize
