We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
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MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
I was walking around the party holding a dog on my shoulder like it was a parrot
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
So I'm already mostly naked in a kind of bed but obviously too lazy to take my boots off. It's like January 1st is already here
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
you asked if you could borrow my vagina for the night
I have vodka, fruit gushers, and health insurance. Let's party.
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