So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
why do married chicks ALWAYS cry after?
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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