You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
As we were passing the joint around, people were dunking Jenga pieces in Vaseline and sticking them to the window. I also smoked weed with a girl that was in an above the influence commercial.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
I want to fling myself into the sun
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
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