Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
I see your creepy poodle photo and raise you a shirtless elderly gentleman who looks like a yetti in cutoffs who may or may not have an ENORMOUS erection.
.... touche....
I'm sobbing to NWA
If I don't singlehandedly make your gf realize she needs to straighten the fuck up or ruin your relationship before I leave I have failed you as a friend.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
