I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
I got 87 likes on my changed relationship status. It's official. I'm way more fucking awesome single.
They're mostly guys
Early bird gets the worm.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
"There should be some kind of award for sleeping with your ex 9 times in 3 days."
He tried to buy me a drink at dollar beer night. All 3 of his credit cards were declined, so he asked me if I could cover it. Needless to say, I'm not calling him back.
There is a high pitched squealing noise coming from somewhere in my house. I hope it's a gas leak cause I'm over this week man.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
