he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Earned the respect of a group of freshman by chugging Das Boot while hanging out a window and lost it shortly after by wrecking a clown bike into them.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
No I don't want to see you. You're the reason that I'm going to need a new liver by the time I'm 30.
Everyone says she blew me in the bathroom, so I believe it, I just don't REMEMBER.
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
There's something about a foam party that makes freshman want to turn their lives into full blown shit shows. And I'm ok with the fact I am one of those.
Randomize
