Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
I just saw a kid drop his lollipop on the floor of best buy, kick it because he was pissed off and then pick it up and eat it. I think I have a long lost son.
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
there are certain things about getting into a cab to go home at 630 am that make me feel like a prostitute.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
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