So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
I shamewalked barefoot this morning and the Dos Equis delivery guy judged the shit out of me.
Of course his biggest mistake was assuming that I ever gave a fuck to begin with.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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