Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I was drunk at peters. now im drunk at my apartment. and hungry. but mcdonalds is broken. wtf
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
You showed up at my apartment after 3 am wasted with a plate of cookies and tried to hook up.
Sorry about that. Except for the cookies.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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