I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
He wrote my name on his dick, took a picture and then said "this has your name written all over it!"
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Cancun blessed me with a drinking problem
I remember climbing onto your table and singing"tequila tequila" into your candlesticks. I apologize.
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Wow i just puked in front of the lady that was drug testing me. I passed though!
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
Randomize
