um. i met him on myspace...we text now, he lives down the street
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Your friends ate a hole through an entire loaf of bread
Just made a drug deal by throwing my money to my dealers window and receiving weed the same way. We are the definition of typical lazy stoners.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
Today in French class my teacher was singing "what does the fox say" so i started answering in similar satanic ritual noises
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
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