she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
Gonna post on craigs list missed connections - "I was that really drunk bitch that threw up in your car. I'd like to pay for detailing"
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
No driving. The car is spinning. I am praying for mcdonalds.
Shared a jello shot with her mom last night. then she tucked me in and took of my shoes for me
He was showing him the picture of the 40 year old woman he made out with in Florida, turns out Chris made out with the same woman.
Go her
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
You should make us a hot pocket to split while I go throw up.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
Randomize
