he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
girl in front of me in lecture is looking up on ask.com about chlamydia.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
All I saw was a beagle come across the screen and explain the theory of relativity to me and leave
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
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