I like my sex mixed with concussions.
He's so far in the closet he's in Narnia
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
the entire lecture hall sighed when the prof announced that there will be an exam on 4/20
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
According to you, you were with your "Eskimo bro for life" last night.
Its not even real halloween yet. This extremely toxic yet briliant costume is going to kill me
I woke up in my living room, on the floor, wearing nothing but a fur coat?
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
Randomize
