Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(713): View more from Texas

we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.

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(713): we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company. http://tfl.nu/8nsz

Replies (7) Good night (1223) Bad night (568)
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(914): View more from New York

Eric just called. Says he's trapped in a cul de sac because the road disappeared. Wants me to tell him what street has the bushes that whisper sweet nothings into you ear and the wobbling purple pokemon. Oh, and a "bigger and better" penis is growing out of his belly button. He took shrooms by the way.

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(914): Eric just called. Says he's trapped in a cul de sac because the road disappeared. Wants me to tell him what street has the bushes that whisper sweet nothings into you ear and the wobbling purple pokemon. Oh, and a "bigger and better" penis is growing out of his belly button. He took shrooms by the way. http://tfl.nu/3diq

Replies (49) Good night (4191) Bad night (1580)
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(561): View more from Florida

As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother

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(561): As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother http://tfl.nu/1acl

Replies (21) Good night (2282) Bad night (613)
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(914): View more from New York

There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone

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(914): There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone http://tfl.nu/hyr8

Replies (240) Good night (2171) Bad night (8530)
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(203): View more from Connecticut

She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone

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(203): She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone http://tfl.nu/bzdp

Replies (25) Good night (6443) Bad night (1171)
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(541): View more from Oregon

I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.

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(541): I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god. http://tfl.nu/ci1f

Replies (10) Good night (6332) Bad night (953)
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(904): View more from Florida

hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.

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(904): hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway. http://tfl.nu/oo0k

Replies (6) Good night (2943) Bad night (823)
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(443): View more from Maryland

Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town

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(443): Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town http://tfl.nu/3b43

Replies (1) Good night (2161) Bad night (702)
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(831): View more from California

Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.

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(831): Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success. http://tfl.nu/9nkx

Replies (4) Good night (1510) Bad night (694)
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(715): View more from Wisconsin

begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown

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(715): begin the sex magic rocket ship countdown http://tfl.nu/xg0v

Replies (4) Good night (1103) Bad night (484)
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(760): View more from California

Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?

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(760): Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting? http://tfl.nu/x0ek

Replies (8) Good night (1281) Bad night (516)
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(817): View more from Texas

She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!

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(817): She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!! http://tfl.nu/esz2

Replies (4) Good night (1403) Bad night (469)
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(541): View more from Oregon

rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.

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(541): rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work. http://tfl.nu/d84s

Replies (3) Good night (794) Bad night (343)
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(651): View more from Minnesota

god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.

(508): View more from Massachusetts

I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.

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(651): god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again. (508): I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended. http://tfl.nu/x893

Replies (2) Good night (472) Bad night (318)
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(713): View more from Texas

He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us.

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(713): He didn't get laid that weekend.. and that is honestly an accomplishment for the rest of us. http://tfl.nu/qccw

Replies (2) Good night (482) Bad night (278)

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