i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
i just looked at my contacts and realized i saved the pizza hut girl's number as "fckucin pizza" the other night.
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
I pretty much gave up on you when you told me you couldn't go home yet b/c you had to stop at church first. It was 2 AM and you insisted you were late for mass.
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We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
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For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
How did our waiter from olive garden end up passed out drunk in my roommate's bed?
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
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