I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
It's a testament to the kinds of spouses/parents we will be that we get so wasted but still show up to every class on time. We honor our commitments bitches!
Randomize