You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I AM DRUNK AND AGGRESSIVE ABOUT CURLING!
The US is in the finals, aren't they.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Have you ever thought, hey maybe the reason we were togather that long was because I was drunk the whole relationship?
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
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