God help me. Come pick me up. The guy told me this is not a hotel and i had to leave.
Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
you know whats awesome about this morning. A suprise visit from my dad at 7:30 am. There was a pair of heels on the lawn and a girl sleeping in just her underwear on the floor of my living room. He either thinks im a champion or a total fuck up. I'm thinking fuck up but im hoping champion.
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
who am I kidding I don't have any dignity. Plus we're not doing a porno, we're just doing random things naked
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
If you need me I'll be getting drunk in a chewbacca onsie like a real adult.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize
