carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
You know it's been a while when you're having to resort to positive conditioning to get women
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
I'm definitely going to class still drunk right now and the freshman dressed as Hugh Heffner last night is texting me. I can't handle this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
Like he was trying to be sexy but he had shit taste in porn so i left
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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