I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I told him I was pregnant. Figured it would soften the blow of telling him I had herpes.
Did it?
Not as such, no.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
Speaking of school, I've done the math and I get laid about 10 times more often than I did before I got my law degree. $100,000 well spent.
i have wind burn on my face from my head hanging out the window of the cab vomitting
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Suffice to say, I think if people ask about your bruises, and you look them right in the eye, and say "they're from fucking...", people would be like, "respect."
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
Randomize
