In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
The only piece of furniture in the apartment is a wine rack.
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
