You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
it's like iHOP with fire
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Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
We are not in the same countries and I heard about your hook up last night BEFORE you.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
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