Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
i love how you can even make your typing come across bitchy
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
And I'm PMSing. So if I'm not crying, I'm masturbating.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So was it you or me who decided it was a good idea to inscribe fuck you on the counter?
That was me. Just a 'welcome to our home' kinda thing.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
I need to throw up and die. The order doesn't matter. I feel like shit
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
This guy is trying to get me to do some acrobatic gymnast shit just so he can see "my tight hole." I'm too big to be sweating in my own damn bed. Shittttt.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
COCAINE IS GR8
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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