the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
she told me i tasted like america
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
found my necklace. it was safe with all 6 boxes of peeps that i bought that night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
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