the day after is always just damage control
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
How bad is it if you swallow a really small piece of glass? Be optimistic if possible I'm anxious about it.
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
My bail money is reserved for people I either A, think were in the right, or B, have an awesome story that leads up to needing it. Just remember that before you call me.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
Randomize