they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
He left his own bachelor party to bring me weed. Then smoked with me. Tell me I'm not his favorite-ex-friends-with-benefits.
I'm at about main and main street
It's been a long time since I got "Talk about Glen's enormous penis" drunk
At least you didn’t announce to an entire bar you’ve eaten pussy, and then knocked your beer over.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
