ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize
