lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
We're not even buying beer. Just vodka. In pre-retrospect this was a bad idea but we're doing it anyway
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
I have fence marks all over my body
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
