omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
His fingers had 12 years of piano lessons behind them. my ex has been put to shame by a finger
we flagged you as soon as you tried to put the lime in the microwave to prove it was really a kiwi. again.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
Fire trucks are here again. It wasn't me this time.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Randomize
