She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
It would be like bopping for an apple with my penis but never winning an actual prize. The only thing I would get from it would be the joy from taking part but then regretting it forever more
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
I can't remember where my feet are. All I can see are colors, and all I can feel is terror. The lollipop was a bad idea.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
You brought a jar of mayonnaise to bed. It doesn't get any worse than that.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
I woke up to a huge bag of McDonalds breakfast, a cup of coffe and Advil. The note read "yeah its a one night thing, but I felt bad so here you go. Thanks"
He just set a new unobtainable standard in one night stand etiquette.
Randomize