jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
just filed my taxes drunk as balls. i may be going to jail.
your cat followed me a mile away from your house. if it doesn't come back, i'm sorry, but I needed to get laid tonight.
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
We should give each other good-luck-on-your-finals head in the morning.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
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