Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
You know when you meet a penis that looks like it was made out of all your hopes and dreams?
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
Remember that time we turned a can of Axe body spray into a flame thrower?
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I think you know you’ve caught feelings when you’re asking a tinder boy his opinion about your current fuck buddy.
Randomize
