can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
well look at the bright side
maybe you can be on an episode of "I Didn't Know I Was Pregnant"
So apparently vaginal secretions are not covered under water damage insurance for my cell phone
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I woke up on the ground next to a bed of naked men. I'm either a drunken genius or the enemy....
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I'm a 23 year old adult who just ordered condoms online from Target because I'm still too embarrassed to buy them in the store.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??