When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
I just sat on the floor of my shower for 20 minutes to punish myself for drunk me's decisions.
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
I prefer to think of hangovers as extreme sobriety, which can only be cured by more booze
Randomize
