Texts From Last Night

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  (682): View more from Texas

  It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good

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  (682): It's what's on the inside that counts<div>(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good</div> http://tfl.nu/bhrm
  Replies (2) Good night (961) Bad night (1116)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm

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  (301): I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm http://tfl.nu/sws3
  Replies (4) Good night (757) Bad night (871)
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  (925): View more from California

  i just saw a foot job.

  (925): View more from California

  porn is incredible...

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  (925): i just saw a foot job. (925): porn is incredible... http://tfl.nu/di0c
  Replies (5) Good night (1612) Bad night (1050)
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  (502): View more from Kentucky

  Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes.

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  (502): Life lesson #57: drinking whisky out of apples leads to threesomes. http://tfl.nu/a8d2
  Replies (15) Good night (6722) Bad night (706)
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  (732): View more from New Jersey

  I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad

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  (732): I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad http://tfl.nu/c88e
  Replies (15) Good night (4779) Bad night (1005)
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  (317): View more from Indiana

  You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time

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  (317): You were absolutely insistent that the entire bar knew that it was peanut butter jelly time http://tfl.nu/w7q6
  Replies (13) Good night (7792) Bad night (1238)
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  (406): View more from Montana

  apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...

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  (406): apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone... http://tfl.nu/2d2g
  Replies (12) Good night (4777) Bad night (1291)
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  (707): View more from California

  And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa

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  (707): And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa http://tfl.nu/9onc
  Replies (12) Good night (2092) Bad night (1011)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high

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  (610): he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high http://tfl.nu/1b4w
  Replies (2) Good night (1679) Bad night (925)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.

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  (610): You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns. http://tfl.nu/o535
  Replies (12) Good night (1298) Bad night (921)
• Favorite

  (312): View more from Illinois

  My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.

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  (312): My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him. http://tfl.nu/tfrh
  Replies (7) Good night (1076) Bad night (534)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move

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  (727): I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move http://tfl.nu/nqhs
  Replies (3) Good night (547) Bad night (322)
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  (915): View more from Texas

  I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.

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  (915): I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers. http://tfl.nu/kpt3
  Replies (1) Good night (571) Bad night (452)
• Favorite

  (702): View more from Nevada

  My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.

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  (702): My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that. http://tfl.nu/98gg
  Replies (4) Good night (701) Bad night (387)
• Favorite

  (307): View more from Wyoming

  Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.

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  (307): Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working. http://tfl.nu/eaxa
  Replies (0) Good night (328) Bad night (184)

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