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• (310): View more from California

  I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...

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• (630): View more from Illinois

  I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People

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• (785): View more from Kansas

  it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..

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• (937): View more from Ohio

  don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit

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  19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive

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• (484): View more from Pennsylvania

  I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.

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• (416): View more from Toronto

  Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?

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• (616): View more from Michigan

  Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me

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• (770): View more from Georgia

  you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.

  (1-770): View more from Georgia

  But what if it got lost?

  (770): View more from Georgia

  its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.

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• (404): View more from Georgia

  I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."

  (404): View more from Georgia

  That's how I look going for the pbr.

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  25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To

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• (905): View more from Ontario

  You woke up butt naked, peed yourself said something about jumbo shrimp, and passed back out 10 seconds ltr..

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• (416): View more from Toronto

  Everyone is like kids first day of school and I'm over here like I need to stop sleeping with random

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• (269): View more from Michigan

  I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.

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• (204): View more from Manitoba

  Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later

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• (508): View more from Massachusetts

  So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.

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• (913): View more from Kansas

  I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished

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