are you still at the devil's house?
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
DOWN HORMONES. BACK.
I'm mad at him and disappointed with you. It's like I put a bunch of effort into a PowerPoint of "what not to do with Zach" to show you and the first bullet point was "do not love him" and you're just disregarding all my effort and friendship.
I have to make mistakes myself to learn from them
FUCK YOU I AM MAKING A POWERPOINT
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't care. She's the only girl to make me feel like my face is melting when she blows me.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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