u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
What wine did you feed Jack? Might not want to waste the good stuff on kitties. Kitties only get box wine.
whoa! who said he's my boyfriend?
Oops. Sorry. That guy you keep accidentally running into in public. And at home. And with your vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
the bright side of moving is at least my Tinder options will refresh
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
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