i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
You should really figure out how to get me a picture that will pop up on my phone when you call
Just upload a picture of Bea Arthur. That's what my soul looks like these days
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
My favorite part about you getting arrested is having to explain the prosthetic leg in the front seat.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Randomize
