Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
im proctoring the SATs right now and im still drunk from last night. i really wanna tell these kids that this fucking test doest mean shit and they will just be constantly drunk once in college.
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
I just bottomed with the last unicorn playing in the background. I've hit a new level of gay.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
What the fuck happened last night.... I woke up with a bowl half full of ravioli next to my head, reversed on my bed still fully clothed.....
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
It started off with wine and ended up with me in only my pearls and heels. It was about the classiest sexual experience I've ever had.
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